


Self Portrait

by La_Tigre



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst and Humor, Artist Eren Yeager, Bisexual Male Character, Cheating, Drinking, Drug Use, Drunk Sex, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Fluid Sexuality, Gay, Gay Sex, Levi/Eren Yeager-centric, Loud Sex, M/M, Modern Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan, Rough Sex, Sexual Fantasy, Smoking, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-15
Updated: 2017-04-23
Packaged: 2018-09-24 16:41:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,779
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9770822
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/La_Tigre/pseuds/La_Tigre
Summary: After leaving art college with flying colours Eren becomes an aspiring artist in the big city with his best friend Armin. Both boys are bisexual and painfully single.However it's not long before what started as a coffee-shop crush quickly turns into something more intimate and far more complicated.





	1. Coffee Shop

**Author's Note:**

> Hello again.  
> This chapter is just a very quick introduction so don't worry, not every chapter is going to be this short. 
> 
> It's good to be writing again so please enjoy this new fic  
> La Tigre xx

Wiping away a stray crumb from his shirt, Eren glanced around the warm and marginally busy coffee shop with a contented sigh. The coffee on the worn wooden surface was half drunk and still hot as he’d consumed it quickly, yet his attention was no longer on the coffee – nor was it on the shortbread biscuit beside the coffee – it was on the short hottie who was tapping his foot impatiently in the queue. 

Hurriedly Eren pulled out his sketchpad and set it on the table in front of him; he knew that this opportunity was too good to pass off and immediately began to sketch, his pencil sliding over the paper quickly and passionately. He peeked up once more. Good. The hottie was still in the queue. After a few feverish minutes of drawing the sketch was complete and Eren sat back in his chair with a satisfied smile.

 

“What’s with the smile?”

 

Eren looked up from his work to be greeted by the sweet and charming face of Armin Arlert.

 

“I’m happy. Is that surprising?” He retorted with a quick-witted grin.

 

“Well I don’t know,” Armin said as he took the seat opposite Eren, “all the great artists were depressed. I’d expect the same of you – otherwise you’re not living up to your title”

 

Eren laughed, sipping his coffee again; it was nearly cold but by god he did not spend $5 on coffee for it to go cold so he drank it anyway. 

 

“Cold coffee huh? Can I see the masterpiece that caused you to abandon it?”

 

Before waiting for an answer Armin pulled the sketchbook over to himself and grinned.

 

“Does this mysterious man really have that good an ass or did you just get carried away?”

 

“Shut up, I’m lonely and bored – I’ll give him a nice ass if he does or if he doesn’t. Anyway he isn’t a ‘mysterious man’, he’s sitting over there”

 

Both boys swivelled to look not-so-subtly at the dark haired hottie sitting by himself in the corner, quite clearly avoiding any social interaction. Letting out a sigh of appreciation they turned back to their coffee. 

 

“Oh wow” Armin gasped.

 

“Huh?” Eren asked, not looking up from his sketch.

“Either it’s our lucky day or it’s our unlucky day,” he said pointing inconspicuously at the door.

 

Eren gaped as yet another stunning man entered, he however was entirely opposite to the other: tall, broad with rippling muscles and sleek blond hair – an undeniable air of confidence emanating from him. The two boys watched in awe as he strode across the room and sat down next to the black-haired beauty, leaning over and locking lips briefly.

 

“Unlucky day…definitely unlucky.” Eren said with a bitter sigh.

 

“Well at least we know they like guys” Armin replied with a defeated smile.

 

Eren nodded in acknowledgment. 

 

“We’re gonna be single forever aren’t we?” He muttered.

 

“Well at least we’ll die alone with each other,” Armin held out his pinky finger, “promise?”

 

Eren took it with a smile. 

 

“Promise.”


	2. The Party

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a long and tiring day all Eren wants is to sleep but Armin reminds him of the party, let's just say that the two boys have very different experiences whilst there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys like this new chapter, it's more full on that what I've written before.  
> For the party scene I suggest listening to Nothing But Thieves - Wake Up Call
> 
> (Warnings: drunken sex, alcohol abuse, vomiting)

Sitting on the train home, Eren stared blankly into space. The pale lights giving his skin a dull glow and just keeping him from nodding off. His hair tickled at the back of his neck and without thinking he let go of the rail to scratch it just as the train began to jerk to a halt. 

 

Eren gasped as he lost his footing and fell forward, bumping into the man in front of him.

 

“I’m so sorry,” he mumbled hurriedly, regaining his balance.

 

“You should be.” Came the cold reply.

 

Eren looked up, shocked at the rude reply to see the hottie he’d drawn in the coffee-shop just the other day. His sharp face was frowning irritably at Eren and cheekbones looked like they could cut through stone. The man brushed a strand of hair out of his face and stared him down.

 

“Could you move? This is my stop.” He snapped. 

 

“Uh- oh yeah sorry” Eren stepped aside and the man strode off onto the platform, Eren’s wide eyes following him every step of the way. 

 

It took him a moment to realise that everyone in the carriage was staring at him. Cheeks flaring hot, he sat down swiftly – doing his best to avoid eye contact with anyone as the train doors closed and it sped on towards his stop. 

 

-

 

“Euthanize me Armin, please” Eren slammed the front door behind him.

 

“What have you done now?” Armin called from the living room with a bemused tone. 

 

The older boy dragged himself into the living room and slumped down next to Armin, laying his head in his lap with a sigh. 

 

“I fell head first into that guy we saw in the coffee shop the other day”

 

“Which one? Black haired beauty or the great stallion?” Armin asked teasingly, sipping his smoothie with a contented grin.

 

“Black haired beauty, he’s smaller than I thought he was…”

 

“What did he do?”

 

“He just glared at me and got off the train”

 

“That’s it? No catching you in his arms? No sexual eye contact?”

 

“Nope”

 

“Well that’s just tragic” Armin smirked down at Eren and he couldn’t help but smile back.

 

“I know, my life’s so boring.” Eren moaned sarcastically, pushing himself up and wandering through to the kitchen.

 

The soft, warm light of the early evening was streaming in through the slightly worn windows – contrasting the characterful black wood of their frames. Arranged carefully on the windowsill were the pot plants: Armin’s pride and joy. Their bright green foliage standing out against the gentle touch of the light.

 

He allowed himself a quiet moment to lean on the wooden counter top, closing his eyes and letting the warmth envelop his skin for a moment. Tracing the scratches of the wood with his fingers gently, he took in a deep breath which quickly transitioned into a yawn.

 

“I’ll make you some coffee then” Armin stated, a small smile playing about his lips. 

 

“I won’t need it, it’s Friday – I’ll just sleep”

 

“Didn’t you get my text?”

 

“It appears not” Eren said, pulling his phone out of his back pocket and checking his texts with bleary eyes. 

 

“A party?” Eren mumbled. “At Reiner’s?” 

 

“Yeah. It’ll be fun, just have some coffee and you’ll be fine. Maybe even have a nap before the party”

 

Eren grunted in agreement and went back through to the living room to slump into the springy sofa.

 

“You’re really wiped out huh?” Armin called jovially from the kitchen.

 

Eren almost brought himself to reply but his eyes were closing and his brain was quickly shutting out his thoughts.

 

Within seconds he was asleep.

 

-

 

Blinking dimly, Eren sat up; rubbing the sleep that was still clinging to him from his green eyes. On the coffee table was the promised cup of coffee from Armin. Eren picked it up and downed it quickly, grimacing at the unpleasant temperature. 

 

Giving himself a quick shake, he stood up – stretching quickly – and checked the time. 19:35.

 

“Armin?” Eren called.

 

It took a moment for the other boy to reply.

 

“Yeah? What is it? I’m busy.”

 

“What time does Reiner’s party start?”

 

A few moment silence then:

 

“Fuck! It started 35 minutes ago!”

 

Eren chuckled to himself, Armin couldn’t bare being late for anything – even parties. Sometimes he’d even show up early to help set everything up. Eren could hear him scrambling about, getting ready desperately.

 

As for Eren, he checked his appearance in the hall mirror; he looked a little tired and his hair was a bit messy – but in the endearing bad-boy way Eren thought. He checked his breath quickly: coffee breath. Not good. 

 

He sorted his breath out and threw a leather jacket on to finish off his bad-boy visual just as Armin rushed into the hall, suitably dressed and presentable.

 

“Looking good, James Dean” Armin muttered with a smile as he shrugged on his coat.

 

“Same to you, Leonardo DiCaprio”

 

“Well I’ll take that as a compliment”

 

They left the apartment with contented smiles, Armin hailing them a taxi – he was the most charming and knew which taxi drivers to trust – as Eren complained to himself about the cold weather. 

 

On the way there Armin made useless small talk with the driver and Eren stared out of the window, the two boys were still relatively new to the city; after college they’d moved as far away from their small town homes as they could – thrill seeking and full of excitement. Though the original novelty had worn off they still loved the big city and all the new opportunities it brought.

 

Reiner’s house was in one of the more decent neighbourhood – as in every neighbourhood there were some unreliable personalities but it was safe at least.

 

They let themselves in, it was obvious which house it was by the thumping bass reverberating around the walls, and were greeted by various people – some of which they knew, some they didn’t and the two quickly split. They had different views on fun and both intended to have a good time.

 

With the first shot down his throat, Eren new that this would be a night he’d either never forget or never remember. 

 

There were a few people he recognized: Jean from Art College, Connie and Sasha he’d met through friends and Annie – he didn’t really know her because she’d never talked to him. Within minutes he was standing and laughing with them, passing round the tequila and singing along to the songs.

 

Meanwhile Armin had reluctantly resigned to the couch next to a couple sucking each other’s faces. He did his best to keep an eye on Eren; an occasional glance to see him with a bottle of tequila in his hand and a dazed grin on his face. He had been sitting on that same couch for an hour, occasionally smiling at someone or turning down their offer to get him a drink; the music had somehow gotten louder and everyone was jumping and yelling.

 

“They look like idiots.” Annie said as she slumped down next to him on the couch. 

 

“Yeah, they do a bit…” Armin glanced at her with a smile, he’d met her a few times in passing. Usually when Eren was around, she didn’t seem to like Eren, but she’d always been at least a bit nicer to him.

 

“You’re straight edge right?” She asked indifferently, taking a swig of whatever was in her cup. 

 

“Yeah, for about a year now.” He found himself smiling at that, “Obviously you’re not” he joked.

 

“Mm.” Was her curt reply.

 

They sat awkwardly in silence for a few minutes until Reiner came over and asked if they wanted to do some more shots. Armin politely declined, Annie didn’t. Before she went she slipped a piece of paper into his coat pocket.

 

“Text me later.” She murmured with a slight smile.

 

He watched her go with a beaming grin.

 

“I will…” he mumbled to himself.

 

Annie joined the others, still smiling slightly.

 

“Where’d Eren go?” 

 

“Dunno, isn’t he usually with Armin?” Jean questioned, slurring his words slightly and attempting to lean on Connie’s shoulder.

 

“No, I was just with Armin”

 

“I bet you were” Jean retorted with a drunken smirk.

 

“Sit down Jean,” Connie cut in bemusedly, “before you hurt yourself.”

 

“Eren’s over there” Connie informed Annie once he’d helped the swaying Jean over to a chair.

 

“Oh I don’t really care, I was just asking” She muttered, rolling her eyes. 

 

The music eventually turned from upbeat and happy to more of a crooning tone. The couples settled down to have their midnight make outs and the dancers found partners to amuse themselves with. Eren was sitting against the wall, a joint between his lips and too much alcohol on his tongue, hypnotized by the dancing bodies around him. He took a drag on his joint and exhaled slowly, looking down at his feet absent-mindedly.

 

“Wanna dance?” 

 

Eren vaguely recognised the voice but couldn’t place it, he looked up with a dazed expression. Looking down at him was that same dark haired hottie that he kept running into, obviously drunk going by the half-drunk bottle of vodka in his hand. 

 

“You’re that guy I ran into…”

“I don’t give a fuck about that, just fucking dance with me” The man yanked Eren up, stumbling slightly and dragged him into the mass of bodies. 

Before he knew it Eren had helped the stranger finish the vodka and his hand were at the man’s waist, his lips at his neck, the man was grinding against his crotch. The music was loud, too loud, it was fast again. Everyone was jumping, moving, non-stop. Eren’s voice joined the drunken shouts and the man moved closer, their bodies grinding hard against each other – feeling each other’s breath on their necks, their hands moving over each other in a drunken haze. They were stumbling through the crowd, fingers interlocked, the heat and sweat building – into an empty bedroom. Slamming the door behind him Eren moved towards the stranger, their lips moved quickly, angrily. Clothes were gone, thrown onto the floor in moments. Eren was up against the wall, both boys panting desperately as they pounded harder and harder. 

 

The stranger’s lips dragged across his neck, moving quickly – sucking hard at the skin and leaving deep red marks. Throaty, animalistic moans and groans filled each breath the boys let out. Harder and faster. Blurred vision and blurred minds, screaming with alcohol fuelled excitement. Fingers tangled in each other’s hair. 

 

Eventually they stopped and slumped, breathless and exhausted, onto the bed. Both were too tired for pillow talk and instantly drifted off into warm, comforting sleep.

 

_ 

 

Throbbing pain split the poor boy’s mind in two as he weakly sat up. His hand rushed to his head and he let out a pained groan as his stomach churned unpleasantly. The bitter taste of bile was ripe on his tongue.

 

He sprinted to the bathroom and vomited, coughing and retching until he was sure that everything he’d eaten in the last few days was out of his stomach. Slumping back against the wall he exhaled heavily.

 

“Fuck everything.” He swore, holding his aching head.


	3. The Encounter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After an unpleasant morning, a hungover Eren still has to go to work. It seems like nothing can make the day interesting...until his one night stand shows up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have to back to school tomorrow (rip) and then I've got shite tons of exams (extra rip) even though I've just done a shite ton of exams and had shite tons of homework over the holiday (even more rip). fun fun fun. well at least I've got an education :)
> 
> I hope you guys have had a fun holiday (is it spring break in 'merica?) and I'm very sorry for the hiatus.
> 
> Please enjoy this chapter, it was a little rushed but Marco's in it ;p 
> 
> La Tigre x

The walk home from Reiner’s was tedious. Pulling his jacket tight around him to shield himself from the cold grey morning, Eren trudged through the streets silently. The raw pain in his head was still persisting, despite the aspirin that Reiner had given him out of sympathy and he was convinced that he was still slightly drunk.

 

He checked his watch:

 

7:24 am

 

He still had plenty of time before work. 

 

Pausing for a moment, he looked around dazedly.

 

As he’d expected he didn’t recognise where he was at all; there was a cluster of shops – all of them stuck in a state of near disrepair – and a worn down bench by the edge of an undersized children’s park with paint-peeling monkey bars and swings. 

 

Wincing as he sat down, Eren pulled a packet of Marlboro cigarettes out of his pockets – he’d blown $15 on them but they gave him a little taste of something like luxury so he gladly placed one between his welcoming lips and lit it. The smoke curled up from his mouth for a moment before he exhaled, dispersing it to join the melancholy clouds above him.

 

He stared at the packet in his hands, the rich red contrasting the drab brown of the bench and the washed-out, dull blue of the fence bars. His mind began to wander, turning back to the events of the previous night – everything was still blurry in his mind but he remembered the man’s face. Pale, sharp and mature. 

 

Taking another keen drag on the cigarette Eren tapped off the ash onto the ground and ran a hand through his unkempt hair. After a few minutes more of silent smoking and introspection he put out the cigarette, gave a defeated sigh and continued on his way.

 

-

 

“Armin?” Eren closed the door quietly behind him as he arrived back at the apartment, it had taken him an extra 40 minutes to get himself unlost from the (more dangerous) part of the city. 

 

“Armin? Are you home?” He called out again, walking into the living room. 

 

“No. Armin died 20 years ago, waiting for Eren to come home” Armin stood up from the sofa and crossed him arms, an unimpressed expression set into his normally sweet face. 

 

“Hi” Eren mumbled guiltily.

 

“You know it’s only a thirty minute walk from Reiner’s right?”

 

“Your point is?” He defensively cut back.

 

“That you’re really fucking late you ass-hat” Armin scowled. 

 

“Armin you’re not my mother” Eren rolled his eyes impatiently.

 

Armin sighed. 

 

“Yeah, I suppose I’m overreacting…you’ve still got time to get ready for work. My shift starts later today” 

 

“I know” Eren said with a warm smile.

 

The smile was returned reluctantly by Armin and he shooed Eren off to get changed.

 

Despite the boys’ best attempts, Eren was still late for work. 

 

_“I’m gonna be totally honest with you, Mr Shadis, I was totally shit-faced last night and woke up in my friend’s bed with no memory of the night before” ___

__Well that’s not gonna fucking work. _Eren thought to himself as he slouched against the hard plastic chair of the train, a classic pair of hangover sunglasses shielding his vision from the cold lights.__ _

____ _ _

____Every rattle, scrape, breath and shuffle seemed painfully amplified to his sensitive ears. Rubbing his temples with agitated fingers the boy leaned back in his chair, sitting in quiet anticipation of when he could finally get off the train._ _ _ _

____ _ _

____And, finally, it was his stop._ _ _ _

____ _ _

____The art gallery he worked at was pretentious – but aren’t they all? A lofty, slim and somewhat twisted building; the art gallery looked as though it would be more at home in a Tim Burton movie than in the modern, busy and constantly evolving city centre. Layers of characterful graffiti clung to it like a child to its mother, obscuring the windows in places and lighting up the gallery with defeated joy._ _ _ _

____ _ _

____Though it wasn’t a daily occurrence, the amount of times that Eren had been late to work – whether it was through sleeping in, partying the night before or getting distracted whilst commuting – certainly wasn’t low. It was only because of Marco, who had – with a tongue like silver – managed to convince Mr. Shadis to keep him on, that Eren was still working at the gallery of oddballs. In fact Marco had made it a game: whenever Eren was late he would guess the reason. If he got it right Eren owed him $5, if he got it wrong then Marco would have to take one of Eren’s afternoon shifts. Eren currently owed Marco $15 and Marco had covered his shift once._ _ _ _

____ _ _

____Attempting the swallow the lump in his throat, he hastened over to the sign-in point. He signed himself in 5 minutes earlier than he’d actually arrived and logged himself into a checkout in the gift shop; conveniently placing him next to Marco._ _ _ _

____ _ _

____“Late again I see…let me guess…”_ _ _ _

____ _ _

____Marco’s hazel eyes crinkled happily as he looked over Eren for a sign._ _ _ _

____ _ _

____“You were at Bert’s party last night?”_ _ _ _

____ _ _

____Eren grinned smugly._ _ _ _

____ _ _

____“Nope.”_ _ _ _

____ _ _

____Marco frowned yet still managed to look happy._ _ _ _

____ _ _

____“I thought you were.” Marco stated questioningly._ _ _ _

____ _ _

____“I was at _Reiner’s _party last night” Eren replied, raising his eyebrow self-importantly.___ _ _ _

______ _ _ _ _

______“Of course, silly mistake.” Marco beamed, “You’d obviously been to a party; you still smell of vodka and weed.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______ _ _ _ _

______“Really? But I had a shower this morning” Eren grumbled moodily._ _ _ _ _ _

______ _ _ _ _

______Marco chuckled optimistically and turned back to the cashpoint._ _ _ _ _ _

______ _ _ _ _

______The two of them chatted in a similar way for a quite a while as the gallery was relatively empty that day, occasionally a customer would buy something but they always went to Marco’s cashpoint: Eren’s messy hair, tired eyes and general grumpy expression seemed to be putting people off._ _ _ _ _ _

______ _ _ _ _

______He found himself staring at the entrance absentmindedly, counting how many people came in out of unadulterated boredom._ _ _ _ _ _

______ _ _ _ _

_______21…22………23…..24 ____ _ _ _ _ _

________ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Suddenly he stood up straight, the blank expression wiping from his face in an instant, and watched as the very man from the night before sauntered in through the main entrance wearing a black trench coat, unbuttoned casually with a well-fitting white shirt underneath._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________ _ _ _ _ _ _

________He leaned over the main desk, a bored expression stuck on his sharp face as he spoke to the receptionist. Eren’s eyes wandered over the sight of him bending over like that; the man’s hair was falling into his face and his tongue dragged slowly across his lips, his fingers tapping irritably on the desk._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________ _ _ _ _ _ _

________The receptionist handed over his pass and, as he turned around, him and Eren made eye contact._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________ _ _ _ _ _ _

________The man stopped and then a small smirk curled his perfect lips, he turned and walked away._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________ _ _ _ _ _ _

________For a moment Eren froze; that smirk, the direct eye contact…it was as if the man was beckoning for Eren to follow him. His heart was thumping in his chest as he stood frozen, trying to work out what to do._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________Fuck it. _Eren threw caution, and appropriate workplace conduct, to the wind and abandoned his checkout.__ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“I need the toilet.” He mumbled to Marco hurriedly, rushing off before he’d even let the last word leave his mouth. In an instant he’d taken the winding and endless stairs three at a time and was trying to catch his breath at the top._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“How did that midget move so fast?” He muttered exasperatedly to himself._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“You took your time” Eren started at the voice and turned around to see the cryptic man himself in all his (albeit small) glory, staring steadily at Eren._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“This is a four story building with no elevator, all things considered I didn’t take that long.” Eren snapped in response, returning the man’s gaze indignantly._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“Well you obviously ran, what made you so desperate?” His tone was mischievous but his face remained stiff and uninterested, throwing Eren off slightly._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“I, uh…I don’t know,” Eren said with the sudden realisation that he genuinely didn’t have a clue why he’d followed him all the way to the top floor in such a rush, “I should get back to work…”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________As he began to walk away, the man caught his wrist and pulled him back with surprising strength. Eren’s face was mere centimetres from his – he could see the emerald flecks in his cold, sharp eyes._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“My name’s Levi by the way, I don’t think I told you that last night”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“Eren.” Was all he could get out as a reply._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


End file.
